2012年12月12日

人生與戲劇 | Life and Drama


夜漸深,人生之夢方醒,茫茫人海起落,是誰依然同行?
It's been late of the night. The dreams of my life have just awaken. Up and down of the surrounding people like ocean, who is still walking with me?

誰是演員?誰情真?我幻聽沙翁在我耳邊細語,多少人堪得住一次次起起又落落?
Who are the actors? Who have been being real to me? I've seemed heard Shakespeare whisper in my ear. How many people can resist ups and downs again and again?

誰是演員?誰情瞋?我活在多少算命師的先擬腳本?!
Who are the actors? Who have been being angry at me? Am I living in the prepared scripts of how many fortune tellers?!

又有多少作家、編劇、演員、心理學家、犯人入戲太深?忘了提醒自己,那只是個被謀策的腳本,就怕有誰飾了誰,而此一失足成白髮人送黑髮人⋯⋯
While how many authors, play writers, actors, psychiatrists, and criminals being in the script too much over, and have forgotten to remind oneself that that just scripts being arranged. I'm so afraid of who have played whom, and which might make me break my legs as well as let the white hairs deplore dark hairs… 

是誰望穿人心?誰教懂我被萬箭穿心?只有誰耳提面命,就怕我一不小心又迷失了自己,摔成了千古之恨。
Who has looked through peoples' hears? Who have taught me being penetrated of my heart? Who have been there to warn me through my ears and to confront me making orders. I'm so afraid of missing myself again and falling into the hate of time.

平平仄仄平平仄,這會兒的心是風平浪靜,我逐漸還能安詳地揮手動筆寫字,喝一杯已經放涼了的溫情,管它是茶是水?
Ping Ping Ze Ze Ping Ping Ze. It is now mild wind and tranquil wave of my heart. I am getting and still being able to safely swing my hands while holding a pen to write characters. Drink a cup of cooled warmth, no matter it is tea or water.

有太多太多不曾言表的感謝與慚愧,匯織成這一篇文!
There have been too much and too much unaddressed appreciations and disgraces, which have weaved this essay!

2012年8月25日

久違隨筆


好些時日沒能覓得如此悠閒的片刻寫文章。

晚上,在台北中正紀念堂前兩廳院廣場有個免費的音樂會,融通東西方傳統樂器和曲風的「絲竹空爵士團」將會於稍晩登台演出。

下筆的當下,距離開場的時間還有一個多鐘頭。我躲進國家戲劇院內的咖啡館裡,沈澱這些日子以來的思緒⋯⋯

回想這些日子以來⋯⋯;回想從出生至由小到大以來的歲歲月月點點滴滴⋯⋯

打自十多年前從美國留學歸國的這些日子以來,「東南西北任飄流」,是這些年來的人生歷程縮寫;也是多年前自己為自己所訂定的生涯座標方向,順隨因緣,尋尋覓覓,累積具足「流源西東本歸一」的實力,讓自己在多年的文化差異水土不服生活中,越越東西方文化本質特性的差異,回歸到同是身為全人類小小一份子的立足點,理當繁衍自已不易考證的遠古共通人類遠祖;每每看著眼前地球人類文明所演化出形形色色之美好與醜惡的事物,明知道自己隻身單薄的力量很微渺,背後沒有大財團可以當靠山,但承蒙並感謝身旁親友和師長們的包容、教誨、與援助,這些年來,只得任性地在「東南西北任飄流」與「流源西東本歸一」這十四個字當中,來來回回地擺盪,企盼「源流東西傳承留」的因緣能夠早日具足⋯⋯

音樂會即將在五分鐘後開始,日前曾向所有在微博和推特關注我的朋友們,所預告要寫的博客網誌文,我不敢忘記給過各位的承諾!

步出戶外,一面聽著台上的演奏,一面一心二用地琢磨著怎麼把今日的隨筆之文,做個即興的收尾⋯⋯

儘管是停寫微博推特短文的這些天,我陸續都還是會收到微博與推特有新粉絲加入的通知,請各位接受在下由衷的致謝,這對我來說已是莫大的鼓勵!

這些天,在我的生活當中也如往常一般,有些發生在我身旁令我感動的點滴小事,今天來不及一一詳細訴盡,一言以敝之,或可說是「一份對於理想所堅持的熱情,發生在我自己和身旁不同人的身上,這份熱情便是凝聚人心最有穿透力的生命旋律!」

打從年少時期開始接受西方爵士音樂的洗禮以來,爵士樂風令我感到亂中有序的旋律,彷彿能消除生活中的那些忙碌紛亂,藉由樂聲來幫助我把握住生活中應有的順序。

音樂會已近尾聲,不管你今天快不快樂,這世界上有兩種快樂,一種是因為受到外在事物所感染的快樂,另一種快樂或許用喜悅來表達更為貼切,那是一種沒有原因、不受外在事物影響,就本來都存在每個人內心深處的喜悅!

如果你在尋找如何「開竅」的方法,我個人的體悟便是先去找到那一份「本來都存在每個人內心深處的喜悅!」

「心平喜樂」,是一份極其微渺不易恆定保持的喜悅,願您能與我一同感染分享!¶